So, do you ever have those days when life is coming at you so fast that there is no time to stop and think? Well today was NOT one of those days! I had too much time to think! We are having a mouse problem in our house. We have caught 5 mice in one week. That constitutes a major problem in my eyes, but whatever. Anywho...we went to bed early (like 9) tonight because Leo has to be at work at 6:30 and I just like to go to sleep. Only tonight I could not sleep. I have been sitting up for over an hour so I decided to come and type my feelings!
We were watching Scrubs (an awesome tv show. For those of you that have not seen it I suggest you rent or buy all seasons and just watch! Amazing!) and everyone on the show has or are having babies. And it made me think. I definitely want another kid. Just one, and not right now, but I do want more. And I know Leo does (even though he may not say it I can tell he does!) but again, not now. But at this juncture in our lives I don't know that we would be able to afford another one. I'm not saying monetarily because no one really ever has enough money for kids unless you are rich. But I mean, I don't feel like I could have another kid in the house we are living in. It is a 3 bedroom house with one bathroom. And the fact that we spend money like it is going out of style and have to many bills to name (even though I could since I pay the bills! :)) plus student loans on top of that it makes it really difficult to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
And maybe it was because when I was growing up I had everything I could possibly want plus some if you ask my parents I'm sure. And right now little man gets pretty much everything he wants (plus more, because we totally got him a ball pit because he loves the one at my parents house). Or maybe it is because I see all these people I know that are doing great things like building houses or buying new houses, cars and having babies. What are these people doing that we aren't. And then there are the people who struggle to have kids and can't but could afford everything and anything that they want. I guess I just need to do what I told Leo this morning and instead of wishing for what we want we need to do something about it. I just don't know exactly what that is.