Monday, May 10, 2010


So after last week's rough week I have been in a pretty crappy mood. And even after spending time with my family this weekend I am still not feeling in the best of spirits. My mom said it might have something to do with my sis-in-law's bachelorette party this upcoming weekend. And I don't know...maybe that's it. I am excited to go, but I get really anxious about social settings. I've talked about it before, but I am really bad at meeting people and being nice to people. I come across as rude but I'm really pretty shy. So maybe I'm just dreading it because all these other girls (who are so skinny and gorgeous) are going to be there and I'm only going to know my sis-in-law.

Also, I think I have come to realize how people get eating disorders. I have lost about 30 pounds in the last 6-8 months. I have lost almost 15 just in the last 9 but I don't really feel like I feel that much different. I know I have lost the weight because I have had to get new clothes, but when I look in the mirror I still see the same me. My boss was saying how she was showing one of our co-workers pictures from her vacation and there was a picture of me on there from the beginning of the year and the coworker was like you have to show that to Kendra because she will see the transformation just from then. So she showed it to me and I couldn't even tell a difference.

So, still in a bad mood, but I thought it might help to get it out there and open up. That's what this blog is for. Not just the good stuff! And I'm going to close the comments because I didn't write this post as a pity party to get happy comments. But feel free to think happy thoughts and send them my way!