Thursday, January 13, 2011

Fun Parent vs. Not-fun Parent

***Just be aware of this post. I am not complaining just stating my version of the truth for my family. Please don't be all judgy-judgy!***

I was having a conversation via email with the hubby yesterday asking how Leo was this morning and cracking up about the things that he does. I said something about how I was taking Leo to the library after I picked him up from school and then we would go home where I hoped he would wear himself out before Leonard got home from work (around 8:30). And he sent me an email back and kiddingly told me that I was being mean and how much he had enjoyed being with Leo lately and playing with him in the evenings since I've been working later. And I sat on this nugget all day. Wondering why I always feel super-stressed out at the end of my work day and just don't always feel like playing with Leo. I always let him play or watch movies or do pretty much whatever he wants but I don't always (read hardly ever) just sit down and play.

And so after thinking about this off and on for the better part of 6 hours I came to a conclusion that I could only blog about because if I expressed this to my hubby I would be looked upon with exasperation. I am the not-fun parent. I am the one that HAS to get stuff done. I'm not saying the hubby doesn't do anything because he does. He's a good helper but he a lot of times has to be asked to do something. Because when I got off work last night I went to the grocery store, picked up Leo, went to the library. Then we got home and I had to cook the chicken for our chicken and noodles along with the rest of the stuff that goes with it, get a different supper ready for Leo because he was just SO hungry he couldn't wait. Then I cleaned out the fridge, changed the sheets on our bed and threw them in the wash with a load of towels and re-dry Leo's clothes that Leonard had left in the dryer and hung them up. Then I took out the trash in the snow and brought the trash can and recycling bin back up to the house. All before 7. And I got off work around 4:15. And I was up at the gym by 5:45. Holy crap. I'm just tired thinking about all of that! And like I said I'm not (totally) complaining but I know why I don't always feel like playing.

So I guess it's ok if I don't always want to play but I also need to look at myself and realize that I don't always have to do EVERYTHING. Maybe I can delegate more. Maybe I can just do some more on the weekends. Who knows. But one thing I know. I don't always want to be the non-fun parent!


cbs111 said...

I totally understand. I think it is the way we as women are wired. Even if we let things slide, our mind is on them and we aren't really present with the kids. It's a hard balance, I hope you find it.

Lucy said...

I truly know where you are coming from.. Now that my kids are gone, "i had 5 children" and I worked between babies and it was like a never ending job for me. You will get through this some how and I know what you mean about talking to a husband. I am now 81 years old and my oldest son is deceased and I look back and am glad I had that hectic life.